When I was approached by FaceGym to come into their Selfridges location and try one of their revolutionary facials, I jumped at the chance for some half term pampering. I plumped for the Hangover Cure (£60) because I had every intention of being taken out on the 14th and getting wasted, alas this just doesn’t happen as a singleton. Shame.
Now my usual hangover cure is sleeping until midday followed by a Gregg’s sausage roll, packet of Walkers Salt and Vinegar crisps and a bottle of Coke. Trust me, dream combo. So I was hesitant about buying into a facial that could cure me of the deadly headache and just-about-to-vom feeling. But y’know, I think FaceGym have got it sussed.
I was directed to the reclining leather chair of dreams to fill out a health consultation. This was required as there would be an electrical object used. This both terrified and excited me.
Then my trainer began massaging my head, neck and chest, which almost sent me to sleep, whilst applying various lotions and potions.
Then came the bouncy ball.
Yep, not joking. You know those plastic exercise balls at the gym? Imagine a smaller one of those. My trainer began by massaging the ball over my chest (fnarr) and shoulders. She pressed it down SUPER firmly into my pressure points and as the ball reinflated, I could totally feel the tension release.
Then she began rolling the ball across my face, making sure to get all of the tension points in my temples and brow bones. The pressure was firm and I remember thinking, ‘this should hurt,’ but it didn’t. It was strangely relaxing.
After the ball was popped away, my trainer gave me another facial massage by pinching my cheeks and eyebrows. Again, sounds totally bizarre but felt amazing. I sat there thinking, ‘my next Tinder match needs to be up for doing this to me.’
This was followed by a derma roller, which scarily looked like a meat pulveriser, to bring the blood vessels in my face to the surface. I immediately saw a flush in my face.
My trainer then explained we were entering the ‘cool down’ period where she applied a super cold lotion to my face and went over it with a jade roller. I need me one of those. I can just imagine how great the cold jade would feel being rolled over a hangover headache.
After this and a cooling mist applied to my face came the electronic device mentioned earlier. The trainer explained it would feel weird and tingly but it wouldn’t hurt. No lie, it felt like I was having the first phase of a stroke. The electric impulses made my facial muscles twist and contort but weirdly IT FELT GREAT and I contracted a severe case of the giggles.
My treatment was finished with a hot towel and off I went about my day with an extra spring in my step. So if you’re ever near Selfridges, hungover or not, let FaceGym make you feel like an extra jazzy version of yourself.
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