What happens when I’m SAD

Vix xxx

  1. Sarah

    November 10th, 2016 at 08:23

    I too suffer from SAD. It’s horrible. At this time of year until around the end of March I feel like I’m in a cycle of doom. One minute everything is A OK, the next I feel like I’m shrouded in a heavy black blanket which makes everything look bleak and totally dismal. I take vitamin D3, try to eat fresh nourishing food when all i really crave is stodge and give myself a blast from the old SAD lamp but if I’m honest nothing seems to make me feel that much better. Yesterday was particularly bad for me. Oddly I do love this time of year, the cold, crisp weather, first snowfall and approaching festivities however this time of year clearly doesn’t love me back. It’s hard coming to terms with the fact that for around 6 months of the year all you want to do is hibernate. Sadly I don’t have any magic tips, i try to get out into the fresh air as much as possible, especially on those cold and crisp days where there’s lots of light. Eat well, keep taking the Vit D3 but don’t be afraid to just be either. Sometimes all you need is some quiet time with a good book, a cup of tea while bury yourself in a little blanket cocoon for a while.

  2. vixmeldrew

    November 12th, 2016 at 13:19

    You’re completely right and I’m going to do a lot of these things. Take care x

  3. Emma

    November 10th, 2016 at 09:14

    SAD is the worst that’s why I always book a winter holiday, feeling so low for such a long period is horrible but you are right it will pass.

  4. vixmeldrew

    November 12th, 2016 at 13:18

    YESSSS I NEED A HOLIDAY. Where do you go for the winter?

  5. Ri

    December 7th, 2016 at 05:42

    Come to Dubai, sunny all year round! I moved here about a month ago and my mood has improved no end!

  6. Madeleine

    November 10th, 2016 at 10:06

    One of my closest friends has SAD. He uses a special blue light box and antidepressants (from the Dr ) to help him get through winter. I have year round depression and anxiety, life can be very hard when it kicks in. Just take every day as it comes and do your best. Just remember not to be too hard on yourself.

  7. vixmeldrew

    November 12th, 2016 at 13:18

    Thank you! Definitely just trying to do things that make me happy.

  8. Romy

    November 10th, 2016 at 11:05

    This sounds so much like me – I have days when I feel like I’ve sunk right into my mattress and can’t climb out, ones where I do make it out and spend 15 minutes staring at a shelf in Boots with no idea why I’m there and ones where everything’s fine until I have to explain something in a meeting and look like I don’t have a clue when my mind goes blank and won’t come back. For me, it’s mostly light boxes (one next to me now…) and amazing antidepressants (last time I ran out in January I had a meltdown at the Sainsbury’s self checkouts). 5HTP worked a little bit, maybe worth a try? I’ve written a bit more about it here – http://bit.ly/2fgDtyh – but nothing too groundbreaking I’m afraid!

  9. vixmeldrew

    November 12th, 2016 at 13:15

    Thank you love, sounds so familiar. Will check it out x

  10. Penny

    November 10th, 2016 at 11:49

    So refreshing to read this! I suffer really badly with SAD, I always feel like I just shut down for autumn and winter, only really switching myself back on towards the end of Spring when the sky is blue and the air around me is warmer.

    It’s been the same as this for years – I wake up and feel a genuine wash of rage at the fact it’s dark and cold.

    This year I’ve decided to try and get a hold of it, so I’m doing the same as you – planning fun things, trying to look for the good in the cold, wet, grey skies (the early morning sun is nice and casts amazing shadows for outdoors photos, something I’ve never noticed before).

    SAD is a pain in the arse, but this year I’m doing everything in my power to try and focus on the positives around me to trick my brain into not being so bloody miserable all the time.

    PS You’ve just reminded me I need to restock my Vitamin D tablets as I’m running low, so cheers for that!

  11. vixmeldrew

    November 12th, 2016 at 13:14

    If i had the money/time I’d genuinely love to run a girls/bloggers who have SAD, weekend away somewhere hot as fuck just to give us all something! Yep get those tablets girl. Thanks for commenting x

  12. Emily-May

    November 10th, 2016 at 14:30

    You know what? This was such a good post to read. I’ve heard about SAD, seen people talk about it. But I’ve never read anything that gives you an understanding of how much it can effect someone. So thank you Vix.
    If I could bake, I’d make you the best cake ever to perk up your evening. But I’m shit at baking!

    Emily-May xo

  13. vixmeldrew

    November 12th, 2016 at 13:13

    That is SO cute. I think sometimes people still write about depression in a flowery way because they don’t want to be too negative but sometimes people need to hear how it actually is. Thanks love, I prefer a nice comment to a cake any way. Ha!

  14. Nia

    November 10th, 2016 at 20:48

    I struggled so much with the winter morbs when I was a teacher. In a way it’s great because you do get to go outside and see the light of day at break and lunch, but I struggled with tacking on a cheery face for the kids – especially when they had their monster-faces on (Wet Playtime – argh!!!!!).

  15. vixmeldrew

    November 12th, 2016 at 12:56

    I’m OK with the cheery faces but find I never get a break/lunch because of dealing with behaviour OR just wanting to sit in the staffroom and not moving until the bell goes again. I should try and get out there more. Thanks x

  16. Naomi

    November 11th, 2016 at 04:12

    Oh hun, I’ m so sorry you suffer so badly with this!
    I have depression all year around, but I’m particularly affected by SAD sometimes.
    I know the feeling of not wanting to get up, but I do it because…well, I’ve got to.
    Drinking tea makes me happy, and wearing clothes that make me feel comfortable and happy. I like to write and inspire myself, to do something that will trick me into thinking I’m super positive!
    If you ever want to talk about it, just hit me up on Twitter xx

  17. vixmeldrew

    November 12th, 2016 at 12:55

    You’re so right, we have to do stuff that makes us happy and that we feel comfortable doing. Thank you!

  18. Amy Baldwin

    November 11th, 2016 at 08:24

    Hey Vix,

    I can relate to this so much. But for me, I seem to get these feelings most of the year round. I would class myself as depressed, but I’m not treated for it. I come home of an evening with all these great plans in my head to study, write a really sassy blog post and take my make up off before bed. 98% of the time that doesn’t happen and I almost feel physically and mentally paralyzed. Then, because I haven’t achieved all the things I wanted to, cue the feelings of failure and self-loathing.

    I always think I’m going to enjoy winter; the snuggly new jumpers, sexy coffee’s from Starbucks, festivities, ETC. But as soon as the dark evening’s roll in, it’s like living ground hog day. Wake up, it’s dark. Go to work. Come home, it’s dark. No inspiring sun sets, no sitting out in the garden with a G&T, just hiding under the duvet waiting for the next day to hit you in the face like a misdirected shit.

    Also, I think the knowledge that the year is drawing to a close kind of makes me look back (subconsciously) on the past few months and if it hasn’t been blow-my-mind-fantastic, I look back and think “well what the fuck did I achieve”?, and it makes me think maybe the best times of year are New Year when you have the whole year ahead, and summer when everything is basically just sun, sea and gin.

    Christ I divert, anyway, the point I’m attempting to make is better times are ahead. Whether that’s tomorrow, when the sun comes out, new year or next summer. And even if it doesn’t feel like it, it helps to believe it, just a bit.
    We’re strong confident women with some serious responsibilities to the world. We have to come back fighting, head held high, ready to own our shizzle.

    I hope today is a good day.

    Amy xx

    P.S I love your new blog design and the posts are, as ever, fantastic.

  19. vixmeldrew

    November 12th, 2016 at 12:51

    You’re so right love, these next months are a vicious circle of wanting to be better, not physically able to be and then hating yourself for it. You’re also right about how we’re strong, confident women and we will be OK. Hit me up via DM/email if you ever need to chat and thanks for your kind words.

  20. Milly

    November 11th, 2016 at 10:14

    I think the problem is that when we do need to relax and refuel we often beat ourselves up about it or feel guilty. I have suffered with SAD for 10 years now and by sheer process of elimination I have come up with a method that works for me to combat it, a 50/50 approach of looking after myself and resting and inspiring my tired brain with trips and days out on the days where I feel up to leaving the house at all. The days where my energy levels are low I treat as a special days, pamper days. Rather than moping about dwelling on what I am missing out on and time I am wasting being “sad” I concentrate on making the most of having down-time, refuelling, reading A LOT, catching up on sleep and with films and Tv programmes I’ve missed, eating lots of snacks and pampering myself with facemasks and bubblebaths. Then on the days where I feel ok enough to venture out I make sure I visit places that inspire me, national trust houses, dinner with friends, museums, a bit of shopping etc… Happy memories that I can carry around all week when times are tough. Because I know my “good days” are fewer during this time of year I try really hard to make them count but don’t punish myself for my bad days. Ultimately I think the bets thing you can do for SAD is to be kind to yourself, accept that some days are harder than others and harder for you than most people who don’t suffer from SAD. Look after yourself, celebrate small victories, rest when you need to and don’t feel guilty for doing so and don’t forget that although it does feel really very lonely to suffer with SAD that you aren’t alone at all <3

  21. vixmeldrew

    November 12th, 2016 at 12:49

    Great advice Mills. Because of my job, I have to spend M-F working 6-6 and can never take a day off. Being a teacher the hassle and guilt of taking a day often makes it worse. Which means I live for the weekends. I try to make it that one day I have a productive/self care day and the other, I get out and do stuff. Thanks gorge xx

  22. Sophie

    November 11th, 2016 at 10:33

    This is a brilliant post and something that needs more discussion, especially amongst young people. Yes, I suffer from SAD and this year I’ve had to quit my job and cancel a lot of plans because I couldn’t face it. It’s awful but, as you say, what gets you feeling better is knowing it’s just chemicals and it’s not you. Distancing yourself from your emotions is amazingly helpful. Mediation, walking (oh, all the walking), animals and home comforts.

  23. vixmeldrew

    November 12th, 2016 at 12:47

    Yep been there with the job quitting! You always regret it when the haze lifts. Need to go for a walk today. Thanks love!

  24. dubliner in deutschland

    November 11th, 2016 at 16:09

    I think I suffer from SAD a bit too. I normally can survive until Christmas but find January and February really depressing months! I just hate when the days are so short and dark. Staying in and binge watching shows and eating chocolate helps a bit.

  25. vixmeldrew

    November 12th, 2016 at 12:44

    I feel like November is the worst for me but next Jan/Feb are going to be tough. I totally agree about TV/Chocolate – instant mood lifters. Thanks for commenting!

  26. Mel

    November 12th, 2016 at 14:58

    This all sounds so horrible 🙁 atleast like you say you do know that it will pass sometime soon.

    Mel ★ http://www.meleaglestone.co.uk

  27. Mia

    November 12th, 2016 at 17:33

    I thought I was bipolar, until I realized it mostly happens in October and February. October is the worst one, and it gets better for a while, before I get bad again in February. I just feel so down and unproductive all of the time, constantly reads too much into other peoples actions and beat myself down. This October was particularly awful. I broke down in front of my lecturer on a crowded train station. Luckily he was really sweet about it and we went to a coffee shop as we both lived near the same station.

    The best way for me to cope with it is just to surround myself with the right people and go to work/study hard etc. In between I just try to do things I like. It all depends on that day’s mood, but everything from binge watching my favorite movies, going for walks around the city or having a coffee at my favorite coffee shop really helps.

  28. Leanne

    November 13th, 2016 at 12:17

    This is pretty much exactly how I felt for the last two months when I didn’t have a job. I’d WANT to do those things on my to do list but I just didn’t have the energy it’s awful, I’m glad that you know you’ll get through to the other side though – that’s the most important thing, hope x

  29. Sophia

    November 13th, 2016 at 12:49

    Totally feel you on every point! That’s one reason I do love teaching because you kind of have to fake it til you make if your mood’s not quite there and they do always put a smile on my face by the end of the day. I do sometime wish I had a job where I didn’t have to be so ta dah! all the time because you can never just sit quietly at a desk and let it pass!

    Basically love this post and your blog, we just gotta keep going!

    Sending some fellow teacher tough vibes!
    Sophia x

  30. Sara

    November 21st, 2016 at 14:33

    I can’t tell if this is something that happens me at this time of year, or whether It is just my good old brain being in a slump. I just feel 100% of the time like I can’t be arsed doing anything other than lie in bed watching snapchats, which make me feel worse cause everyone else looks to be having a ball of a time. Ugh Social Media, feck off!

    I do have mild depression which I already am on medication for, but this time of the year is so hard to motivate myself to do anything, whether that be brush my hair like you said or leave the house in general. I always find getting out for a walk with the dog to raise my mood, but getting out itself can be a god awful hard thing to begin to do. #ViciousCycle! My blog has also gone down the shitter because 1. Natural light where are ya? and 2. Effort! I find myself sighing a lot. UGGGGGGGGH!

    I don’t have any magical cure, Sorry. Just know I’m with ya on this one.

  31. Vicky

    December 5th, 2016 at 19:15

    This post really spoke to me, particularly the bit about not physically having enough energy to get out of bed. There are days in the winter months where I seriously consider whether being too tired is a valid reason to call in sick to work. I always make it in the end but like you say it’s a mad rush to do the bare minimum to leave when actually you had so much planned to do in the morning.

    I have one of the alarm clocks that lights up like a sunrise and I don’t find it helps that much either. I’m trying to get in a good routine but failing miserably at the moment.


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